Emotional Pain, Stress, and Fibromyalgia

Please sign up for my email list updates. All we talk about is how to feel better from fibromyalgia! thanks.

This is an email conversation with a woman who said I could post it here.

Thank you for your inspiring email. It’s nice to hear that my body is ok and that I can recover. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia a week ago but have been experiencing pain for awhile now. I’ve been active in support groups online but it seems as if most people who post comments are people who don’t believe they are going to get better. They talk about filing for disability and how my fibromyalgia isn’t going to get any better. It’s heart-breaking! I do suffer from depression; I’ve suffered for about 9 years– I am 30 now.

I bought your e-book yesterday and have been reading through it. I just ordered a yoga bolster so I will begin the program once that comes in. I’m in a scary place right now. I miss my old life and I have a lot of fear that I will not get better. I’ve had a lot of stress in my life–especially this year. My fiancé and I broke up, I lost my job due to chronic headaches, I’ve had to move back in with my parents where I don’t have much emotional support because my family thinks my pain is “all in my head.”

I apologize for the long email- I just needed to vent to someone who has beat fibromyalgia instead of venting on the support forums. I get a lot of “you need pain medication” “go on disability,” etc. I don’t WANT all of that, I WANT to beat this. I want to fall in love again and have children-that is my dream. I’ll be damned if that is all taken away from me (sorry for the language).

Anyway, I look forward to following the strategies in your e-book. I’m a little concerned about the Guai Protocol as there are so many products that you can’t use. I see a rheumatologist next week. Do you recommend that I bring it up to him or do it on my own?

Congratulations on beating FM- you are most definitely a success story! I hope one day I can be a success story too!

thanks for the letter, and thank you for purchasing my book :) .

Yes, many people come to me with that issue with support groups. I myself try to go to groups and tell them “I had that, this is how I fixed it” and my voice is totally drowned out by the people saying “poor baby, there’s nothing you can do”

I LOVE my bolster :) I got one for my husband too so I actually have two ( hee hee). You will love yours I bet. It’s become such a place of comfort to me.

I am so sorry to hear about all the recent stress in your life. That is really hard and is not going to make things easier for you.

That is going to be job number 1, is controlling your response to the stress. You can’t stop it from happening, so you have to find a way to be ok with it.

re guai, I totally recommend you bring it up with your doctor you are going to see. You can gauge his or her reaction by just asking what he thinks of it, or if he has ever heard of it.

If he has heard of it and supports it, that’s a strong team member on your side that you can use to help get over setbacks if you have any.

If he poo poos it you can just say OK, and decide what you are going to do from there. Once he’s heard of it once, he may be more open to it if he hears of it again, and his future patients may benefit.

Thank you! I’m so glad that you have found some inspiration in my story. I am certain you can get better. I can’t wait to hear some good stories from you.

Thanks for your quick response! Yes, reading the online forums is upsetting to me. I go on them looking for hope and end up upset because I’ve read about a woman whose FM put her in a wheelchair. That scared me!

I know that I need to get my stress under control. It’s going to be tough for me but I have to learn how to better deal with it. It’s only complicating things for me. Changing the way I think is so important. I’m so incredibly stressed that I have this illness which further depresses me and then my thoughts go crazy. I have thoughts like! “No one will want to marry me, I won’t be able to get back to work”, etc. I’m so insanely jealous of people who aren’t in constant pain. How can I let that go?
I’m looking forward to receiving my bolster! I’m hopeful that I will start feeling better soon. I go to a rheumatologist on Wednesday and I will definitely bring up the Guai protocol and see what he says.

Thanks again for your response. I look forward to hearing from you again soon!

:) I don’t know if your question about how to let your thoughts go was rhetorical or not, but I do have an answer about things that helped me.

I had a huge problem with my thoughts for most of my life and I didn’t even KNOW it until a friend gave me a book that kind of introduced me to the fact that I was thinking inside my head and having physical and emotional responses to thoset thoughts. I identified SO STRONGLY with my thoughts I didn’t even realize that they were there. I don’t know if that makes sense or not – but until I read this book I never even realized that there were voices in my head. lol.

Ok, so the book my friend introduced me to was You Can Feel Good Again. It’s here or you may be able to find it in the library.

I’ve read this book three times, and I’m sure I will read it again. It has helped me SO MUCH. every time I read it I get more out of it, because every time I have read it I am a bit different of a person.

Then, after that book, other books that have helped me immensely are anything from Byron Katie. If you are going to read one of her books I suggest you start with “I need your love, is that true?”

that also helped me immensely. I am married, but I had this huge issue with how my husband treated me (not well, I thought) and appreciated me (not at all, I thought) and so our relationship was bad. Just letting go of some of that stuff has made all the difference in the world.

I’ll tell you something else too, … I did 5 to 6 years of physical actions to try to heal my fibromyalgia, and while I was doing that I was also trying to get my mental act together. Sometimes, these days, I think that the mental part was much more important than the physical part – like the mental part was the important part and the physical part would have taken care of itself.

Thanks for your response! No, I was really asking how to just “let it go!” :) The more I read your blogs and your book I can totally relate to how you used to think! I worry like crazy and the voices in my head are so loud, they drive me nuts. I don’t remember the last time I felt calm or at peace inside..it’s been years. I grew up not ever feeling good enough..I had girlfriends but inside I always felt a little nervous to open up to them (this feeling began in gradeschool). I think this all stemmed from my mom-she would call my sister and me names and I always felt like I was either in the wrong, in trouble, or not good enough. For example, I’d come home with a B on a test and my mom would say “why didn’t you get an A?” Things like that– I’m not blaming her but I think that’s where it all started.

It’s interesting b/c all over the support forum boards are people who don’t believe they’re ever going to get better. The say that they’ve tried everything and the only thing that gets them through is painkillers. I understand their frustration with FM but I want to believe in myself. Interestingly enough, I don’t think I ever have. I understand what you mean about the mental part is the most important piece to this illness. It’s so hard to believe that my emotions could wreck such havoc on my body but I guess so.

I’ll admit that I am scared. I’m scared sh*tless but I can’t continue to live this way. I was miserable before I got fiber, now I’m even more miserable, so I’ve gotta change my thinking. It is very tough when you’re in pain all of the time but I believed I kind of worried myself sick. I had headaches for 2 years-constantly and I worried so much that they would never go away. Headaches were all I talked about. Now I still get them along with the all over body pain-which I’m going to change! Before the headaches I was just filled with unhappiness and depression. I still am but maybe FM is a wake up call, ya know?

I bought “It’s Easier Than You Think” by Richard Carlson. The bookstore didn’t have “You Can Feel Good Again.” I’ll have to buy it off Amazon. Thanks for the recommendation. I’ll have to check out Katie Byron’s books too!

I’m trying to get myself to sleep better. It sucks that fibro people tend to kick themselves out of stage 4 sleep. Do you remember how you managed to better your sleep? Forgive me if you wrote that in your book-I am working on reading it through.

Well, thanks for corresponding with me. You’ve been a big help. I like talking to someone who’s gotten better not people who don’t believe they will.

OK, good, I’m glad you were asking. You know, as I read over this conversation, I think that it could really help people. Do you mind if I post it on my website? I would remove your name and any identifying info, of course. If you don’t want me too, that’s fine too.

I don’t remember the last time I felt calm or at peace inside..it’s been years. I grew up not ever feeling good enough..I had girlfriends but inside I always felt a little nervous to open up to them (this feeling began in gradeschool). I think this all stemmed from my mom-she would call my sister and me names and I always felt like I was either in the wrong, in trouble, or not good enough.

I can totally relate to this – and I that is definitely part of the healing from fibro – learning to become calm, and even joyful inside. You can do it. If I can do it, anyone can do it, I promise :)

My fibro started with headaches too. I had headaches every day many years before I was diagnosed with fibro. It’s all neck, shoulder, back, and hip tension and trigger points.

So, just talking here …. what would make you happy and excited? Is there anything that you could do yourself that would make you feel happy? besides feeling better? that is one good thing about fibro, it gives you something to focus on that’s in your control. Or at least I believe it’s in your control for the most part.

I’m glad you got something by carlson – I’ve read a few books by him, but the You can Feel Good Again is definitely the very best.

What helped me to sleep was flexeril when I was at my very worst – if you have a doctor who will prescribe you some, and valerian root for a while, and occassionally I used to use benadryl too. I don’t need anything now though.

Well, thanks for corresponding with me. You’ve been a big help. I like talking to someone who’s gotten better not people who don’t believe they will.

You are very welcome. It’s very important, I believe, if you want to get better, to either talk to people who believe you can, or talk to no one at all – otherwise the other people will bring you down and decrease your belief. Your belief is important. In a way, I believe your belief instructs your brain and body to heal just as your disbelief can instruct your body and brain to not heal.

If you are ever looking for something else to read, you may want to look into books about healing like spontaneous healing by Dr. Andrew Weil. Just something to put on your list :)

I’m sorry it’s taken me a few days to get back to you, my symptoms have flared-up. Sure- you can definitely post our conversation on your website. If it would help other people then I would be glad!

A couple of things I could add to that: I often don’t know how to “let go” or be myself. I don’t believe in myself which definitely is hindering my ability to get well. I’m having trouble finding happiness because I’ve been through a lot and feel so sick. If I learn to become calm, you really think I could feel joyful inside?

You said that your fibro started with headaches? How long did it take for you to get rid of them? I never got headaches too much growing and now they are everyday- ugh! I have to say my head, neck, face and jaw are my worst symptoms. My face and neck will burn at times-gosh, it will hurt so bad.

I’m a teeth grinder/jaw clencher at night so I have a lot of trigger points in my face and, for sure my neck. I was reading a post on your website about denervation. I assume that’s why parts of my body will burn at times. Did your face ever burn? I just bought the trigger point workbook so I plan to start working on them. I will roll around on a tennis ball and sometimes after I’m done my back/neck feels worse. I’m not sure why that is. Maybe I’m doing too much?

To answer your question: what would make me happy and excited? Is there anything that I could do that would make me feel happy? I’m not sure. I mean, of course feeling better would make me happy…ecstatic but deep down I know that’s not going to happen unless I work on changing my ways. I’m pretty much obsessed with fibro- it’s all that I think about.

Maybe finding a distraction would help me. Distracting is really hard to do though when you hurt all over. It would be nice to feel in control of something though. I plan to start doing yoga and I’ve been walking on the treadmill. I notice that my back will start hurting after a few minutes on the treadmill. I wonder why that is? It’s possible that I’m walking too fast of a speed. I would love to go to the gym and do a whole yoga class but I’m not sure my body is ready for that.

Anyway, back to your ? of finding something that would make me feel happy or excited. I love music and would like to start a blog about songs and lyrics. I’d also like to reconnect with a couple of friends. I basically feel like I lost all of my friends since I’ve been sick. My sister even stopped coming around. Ouch-that hurts.

My friends/family just don’t seem to understand–as much as I try to explain. I can’t change other people, I’m learning. I can only change myself and my reactions to other people. I try SO HARD and put SO MUCH energy in trying to get my mom to understand what I’m going through and she just can’t get it. Then I react horribly to her, get myself all worked up for what?? So my mom can be convinced further that I need therapy?-lol.

I’m long-winded today- I hope you’re not bored. I used to take flexeril, maybe I will ask my dr. for some. I take benadryl sometimes too. My drs want me to be on an antidepressant but I’ve tried so many in the past with not so great outcomes plus they have horrible side effects.

I will look into Dr. Andrew Weil’s books, thanks for the recommendation. Well, thanks again for talking to me, you have been such a big help! I hope to talk to you soon and in the meantime I will work on believing in myself and my trigger points.

No problem – don’t hurry to get back to me, I understand :)

Thank you for letting me put this on my site – I’m sure that these discussions will help someone. There are a lot of people feeling like you. I used to.

Offhand, have you ever heard of abraham-hicks? This kind of view clashes with some people’s beliefs sometimes, and if that’s the case with you, then disregard, but I thought you might be interested http://www.abraham-hicks.com/ … if you were open to it, it could help you with these feelings of not being able to relax and let go and be yourself.

Personally, I believe we are all joyful at our core. I believe that our connection with God or our inner Self or Soul is pure love and joy, and we as humans cover all that up with a multitude of crap, so yes, I believe if you can find your way to your core you can feel joy, because I believe everyone can.

Knowing me, and knowing myself, and knowing my past and how I used to be … if I can then anyone can. :)

Not saying that I feel pure joy and love all the time, but I am have had many deliberate moments where I do feel joyful and I do feel good and I have learned how to train my thoughts into patterns that allow me to feel good and be happy so much more of the time. this is the work. :)

Yes, before I got fibro, for a few years I would come home with a headache, take a couple of motrin, take a nap, and get up and go about my day.

Now I can see that what the headache was telling me was that I was stressed and my muscles needed attention and care, but I just took motrin and didn’t care for them – so essentially that was probably a big part of me getting fibro. I didn’t know … I personally think this kind of stuff should be taught in school.

I never ‘got rid of my headaches’ per se, I just developed fibro and then I was in a lot of pain all over my body all the time. As I started figuring out how to care for all this stuff, I got less and less pain and less and less headaches. I actually went about 2 years without ever getting a headache .. :)

My son used to grind his teeth at night – we figured out it had something to do with congestion and decongestants would stop it. I don’t know if that has anything to do with yours – you just may have tension that doesn’t know how to relax at night.

Yes, I would sometimes get burning in my face or ear area – I think it is denervation, even in the face.

If you feel worse after rolling around on the ball that means either 1) the area is really bad and needs a lot of work or 2) you got something big to let go and now all the stress chemicals and metabolic wastes that were caught in the muscle or fascia have been released and the blood is trying to clear it all out of the body.

or at least that’s what I have found in my experience.

You may want to start with a rest and relaxation yoga class – that’s how I started. I went every week for a couple of months before I ever went to a real yoga class. It was wonderful. I should do that again :)

and take it easy on yourself … and your mom :) You may never be able to get her to understand. If you can find a way to be ok with that then you will be happier. :)

I know though – it seems like our parental relationships are the absolute worst and hardest ones … :) that’s where all my issues seem to like too. lol

hope that you are doing well. I am really thankful that I found you. It’s so nice to read your blog and emails and have hope. Like I said before, online forums stress acceptance and finding a way to live a “normal” life with this illness. That upsets me because I want a healthy life. My mind is spinning every single minute of every day, thinking, worrying, projecting, it’s driving me mad! I have the scariest thoughts which cause me to be incredibly anxious (I received your email, “Major Anxiety from Minor Thoughts?” and am going to respond to it.) I have MAJOR anxiety-sometimes from minor thoughts and sometimes from major, horrific, scary thoughts.

Anyway, I’m a little familiar with Abraham Hicks. I am familiar with the book “The Secret”-the message being that if we believe that we are well then we will be. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.. or something like that. No-that view doesn’t clash with me at all. :) I definitely understand the mind-body connection but here comes my negativity again… I think, “if all a person has to do is change the way they think then why aren’t more people with fibro better?” So I continue to doubt that my mind can be so powerful that I fall back into the negative thinking and continue to feel bad. Can I ask you something?- how were you able to not doubt yourself when drs and online forums tell you there is no cure? I keep experiencing all of these new symptoms-they scare me :( I’m feeling more fatigued everyday- I want to feel BETTER everyday, not worse! I had a nervous breakdown tonight because I exercised and am in so much pain after. I only walked for 10 minutes-sheesh! My anxiety is very high ALL of the time. That’s something that I need to change. If I continue to get horribly anxious and have panic attacks, then healing won’t occur, right?

About the headaches that you used to get.. I think you wrote in your blog that your neck bothered you a lot? Do you think your neck contributed to your headaches? I have trouble with my neck. I think I have a lot of scar tissue b/c I had neck surgery this past April for a herniated disc. By the way, that’s awesome that you didn’t have a headache for 2 years! My time will come- it better!

I believe that we are all joyful at our core too. Finding my way back to the joyful Pam would be absolutely wondrous! How did you focus on being happy when you were in such pain? You wrote in your in your book something like we need to learn how to be happy in the now without attaching any conditions to it. I definitely think all of the time “I’ll be happy when I feel better and free of fibro.” I’m sure I will be happier but it’s my own low mood and negativity that is making me sicker. YES- it is work to change your mindset and start thinking more positive. I’ve been so negative for such a long time- I don’t like the way it makes me feel- depressed and hopeless. Do you think that people with fibro don’t get well b/c they are not positive about themselves and maybe have a bleak outlook? What about the people who DO have a positive and still have pain? I guess I wonder why positivity works for some and not for others.

I definitely have tension that doesn’t know how to settle down at night. I’m so anxious all day long that when it comes to sleeping, I guess my I clench my jaw. Oww- that hurts! I’m going to try doing the child’s pose restorative pose before bed- I’m sure that will help calm my mind.

Did you have trouble with “fibrofog”? I feel out of it a lot-my eyes are blurry and burn. I don’t like that feeling. Was there a supplement that helped you deal with that?

When you did the Guai Protocol, did you get your body mapped? I just ordered Dr. St. Amand’s book. I’d like to try it but am having trouble finding a physician or a physical therapist who knows about Guai or who is willing to learn. I’d love to start to see some improvement.

Thanks for letting me email you- I really appreciate it. I’m sorry if it’s a bit negative, I’m working on turning that around!

I had another thought this morning too … about racing thoughts. I am going to actually write a post on it because it’s a good one, but here it is for you.

Racing thoughts are the result of emotions that have not been directly experienced. As children, we all instantly feel and process all emotions (usually by crying). Eventually, schools, peers, and parents have convinced us to not feel our emotions and think about them instead.

This is my experience and my opinion – I don’t like to make blanket statements, but talking like this will help me try to make my point.

So, when you have thoughts that won’t stop coming into your head, it’s a tip-off that you had something happen recently that you didn’t directly experience, and now the emotional energy is pinging around in your body, trying to get you to feel it .. expend it … experience it so it can pass through.

Last night I fought with my husband shortly before bed. We made up and I went about my night. This morning while I was in the shower I couldn’t stop thinking about him and how wrong his actions were and what I should have done and on and on ..

“wait a minute” I said to myself “this is over – why can’t I stop thinking about it?” and then I realized I probably hadn’t directly experience the feelings as they were happening – instead I jumped right into anger and verbally attacked him. After we had made up I still didn’t experience the original feelings, so they were still there in my body.

So, then I asked myself “what does this make me feel?” and the answer came “frustrated, irritated” and then I asked myself, “and what does that feel like?” and I ‘opened myself up’ to feel frustrated and irritated … and I felt it right away and a whole bunch of feelings came flooding up and sicked up … and then I was fine and the thoughts stopped coming into my mind.

So, I remember a period in my life where I had to sick up about 30 years of feelings that were never directly experienced. I read a book – I’m forever reading books :) this one … and I took it seriously. emotional clearing

oh, and there’s another one … have you ever had any trauma in your life? this one gets into traumatic memories and emotions stuck in the body
waking the tiger

After a few months or years of ‘sicking up’ everything that had happened in my life (I had an extremely violent and abusive family) I felt a lot better in general – the whole mental thing just wasn’t that big of a deal anymore. but it’s something you have to stay on top of.

Ok, I’ll have to write you another email for the rest of your questions .. getting late here :)

I appreciate it more than you know that you have taken the time to correspond with me. I don’t feel as alone now. There is a woman who has a blog and many video recordings on Youtube regarding her recovery from fibro. She thinks she’s had it for her whole life (she’s 41 now).

She is 95% recovered due to the Guai Protocol, other supplements and certain lifestyle changes. I’ve written to her and she has given me some helpful advice as well. I feel a lot better talking to you and her than I do participating in online forums where nobody has really gotten much better, or if they have, they still sit there and discuss their symptoms all of the time.

That scares me because I do NOT want to be in a wheelchair or walk with a cane. I mean, there is nothing wrong with that, I understand that people have disabilities.. But if fibro can be reversed why are these people getting worse? What aren’t they doing that causes them to become disabled? Any idea?

Before I was diagnosed with fibro, I had been suffering from depression and anxiety for about 8 years. For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a feeling of not being good enough and I think that’s what has fueled the depression and caused fibro. (I think I told you this all before but I’m not sure).

I don’t know HOW to think any differently about myself. I’ve been doing your recommended stretches and find that they help which is a good thing. It’s the emotional stuff that is going to take WORK. I find myself thinking, “If all I need to do is think positive instead of negative than why aren’t more people better? Why isn’t THAT the cure?”

I have a question– how did you deal with “normal people” doing “normal things” like shopping, going to the movies, dinner, having a social life, etc. when you weren’t able to because of fibro?

I get so insanely jealous of my family and friends doing things while I’m hardly able to fend for myself some days. Would you recommend me telling myself over and over that I “am recovering and I will be able to do all of those things again someday?”

You had sent an email about a week ago regarding “Major Anxiety from Minor Thoughts?” I have A LOT of anxiety (I’m sure you can tell by my emails- LOL) and my worried thoughts cause me so much emotional pain. I’m not so sure if they are “minor” thoughts, I think they’re pretty major but I will think things like, “I’m never going to get married and be able to have kids because of fibro.

Who would want to marry someone who is chronically sick?” (I really want kids more than ANYTHING so this thought causes intense anxiety for me.) Really, thoughts like this are NO good for me but for some reason I just keep thinking them. Another thought that I have that causes me to feel panicky is somewhere along the lines of “I’m such a loser.. I am 30 years old-back living at home with my parents.” Thoughts like that make me feel really bad about myself.

Deep down I know that it’s not true that I am a loser- but I see friends, acquaintances, etc getting married, having careers and I feel like I am being cheated. I guess when I didn’t have pain I totally took good health for granted. It’s just so scary to wake up everyday feeling bad and not knowing if I will ever see the light at the end of the tunnel. My mom tells me to “believe” all of the time. I’m working on it- I know recovery may take some time but if I don’t believe that it will happen then it won’t.

Today was better–I ran some errands with my mom, did some yoga and cooked for myself. I’ve been trying to follow Dr. St. Amand’s Hypoglecemic diet. I have a feeling that part of my pain is because I’m carbohydrate intolerant. I’m not sure, but time will tell.

You said:
Racing thoughts are the result of emotions that have not been directly experienced. and–

So, when you have thoughts that won’t stop coming into your head, it’s a tip-off that you had something happen recently that you didn’t directly experience, and now the emotional energy is pinging around in your body, trying to get you to feel it .. expend it … experience it so it can pass through.

So you mentioned that you and your husband got into an argument one night and even though you made up, you were still thinking about the fight the next day because you didn’t allow yourself to feel in the moment. So you ‘opened yourself up’ to feel frustrated and irritated … and felt it right away and a whole bunch of feelings came flooding up and sicked up …

HOW DID YOU DO THAT? LOL!! You just ask yourself what it feels like to be “feel frustrated?” There are some things that I can’t think about because they hurt too much. For example, I had a fight with my sister the other night. She is upset with me because I am not “there for her” and “all I care about is myself and my ‘illness.’”

We screamed and yelled and she said “You don’t have fibromyalgia, it’s all in your head!! All you do is sit there and think about how bad you feel”… I proceeded to get so upset that I punched the door and she thought that I was trying to hit her. Well, I wasn’t but that’s besides the point. She ran off angry and left me feeling all of these horrible emotions about myself and my situation. Now when she calls the house and I hear my mom talking and laughing with her, I feel so many different things: sad, angry, lost- it stinks.

I’ve never had a huge trauma in my life but maybe a bunch of little ones throughout the years. SOMETHING happened that left me feeling inadequate about myself. I bought the book, “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie and am looking forward to reading that. I might look into reading “Waking the Tiger : Healing Trauma” as well.

Ok, well I’m off to do some stretching. OH- one more question– I did some yoga today- I only did about 5 or 6 poses from a “Simple Yoga” DVD but my back is burning sore now. Does that happen in the beginning? I also over stretched my arm/rib muscles the other day and had horrible chest/rib pain for 2 days. I guess I have to go at it slow.

Thanks again for your wisdom and understanding. Have a great holiday if I don’t hear back from you sooner!

Merry Christmas! :) I hope it was OK for you.

She thinks she’s had it for her whole life (she’s 41 now). She is 95% recovered due to the Guai Protocol, other supplements and certain lifestyle changes.

That is so awesome :) I am so happy to hear there is someone else spreading the word like this :)

But if fibro can be reversed why are these people getting worse? What aren’t they doing that causes them to become disabled? Any idea?

They don’t believe they can get better. So they aren’t taking any steps toward it. And they are doing the same thing they have always done. I believe fibro is cumulative, and if you do the same thing, you will get worse and worse.

I don’t know HOW to think any differently about myself. I’ve been doing your recommended stretches and find that they help which is a good thing. It’s the emotional stuff that is going to take WORK.

Oh yEAH, the emotional work is the hardest work. :) I’m not sure exactly HOW I did it, except I read all those books I recommend over the course of 5 years, and it just happened. I read the books, I implemented the things they talked about, and I got better, step by step, inch by inch, I got better and I became a different person.

I find myself thinking, “If all I need to do is think positive instead of negative than why aren’t more people better? Why isn’t THAT the cure?”

Ha! Doctor Sarno says that people don’t even need to think positive, they just need to get real with themselves and those around them, and stop repressing rage. I read all his books too … and he says it is a total and complete cure. He says he doesn’t even recommend physical therapy anymore because it distracts from the real cure.

Abraham-hicks says if you can think and FEEL positive not only will you stop your pain but your life will all around get better :) this is what I am going for :)

I have a question– how did you deal with “normal people” doing “normal things” like shopping, going to the movies, dinner, having a social life, etc. when you weren’t able to because of fibro? I get so insanely jealous of my family and friends doing things while I’m hardly able to fend for myself some days.

Well, let me be really honest with you here. I used to have a friend who that I was quite jealous of – she had no issues or problems and I had all these issues and problems.

Then, over time, I got better, and not only did I get better, I discovered this huge secret about my body – how to take care of it, how to stretch it, when to stretch it, how to fix aches and pains – I got proficient at getting rid of any pain I had for any reason …. I learned what sensations in my body meant and what would help or fix them …

and then I ran across that friend at a party, and her back was out, and she’d been to the doctor and he couldn’t help her and she didn’t know what to do. And she’d been miserable for months.

And I was getting better, and although we were both getting older, I didn’t have to fear it, because I now had an ‘owners manual’ to my own body. Fibro had given that to me. My friend had no such thing.

… so now you are getting your own ownder’s manual :)

causes intense anxiety for me.) Really, thoughts like this are NO good for me but for some reason I just keep thinking them. Another thought that I have that causes me to feel panicky is somewhere along the lines of “I’m such a loser.. I am 30 years old-back living at home with my parents.”

These thoughts aren’t going to go away. You have to ‘short circuit them’ and train your mind to think different thoughts instead. Thoughts that make you feel good. Thoughts like “there is someone out there for everyone, and there is someone out there for me” … go down that road. Listen to abraham-hicks on youtube – they give lots of suggestions for how to change your thoughts. And also Dr. Carlson – he has good suggestions too.

There is going to be a point where you just have to decide that your life is good and getting better, even if you don’t believe it yet. Just decide it and don’t let your mind or anyone tell you different. And then some good stuff will happen and then you will have some evidence :)

So you ‘opened yourself up’ to feel frustrated and irritated … and felt it right away and a whole bunch of feelings came flooding up and sicked up …
HOW DID YOU DO THAT? LOL!! You just ask yourself what it feels like to be “feel frustrated?” There are some things that I can’t think about because they hurt too much.

:) lol. Ok, so I had to learn how to do it. And I learned while reading a book – emotional clearing. And I just keep trying and I get better and better. My father died when I was two. And while I was reading this book, the crocodile hunter died, and I used that incident to ‘feel’ and ‘get out’ all that crap from my father being gone. I spent two hours on my living room floor screaming at him for dieing – apparently I was pretty mad about my own life situation.

So, that was definitely a turning point for me.

Then, I read another book, waking the tiger, I think I’ve mentioned it before, and it has a very specific method for gettin over traumatic memories – and I did that twice, and those were also ver defining moments for me.

You just have to keep working at it :)

She ran off angry and left me feeling all of these horrible emotions about myself and my situation. Now when she calls the house and I hear my mom talking and laughing with her, I feel so many different things: sad, angry, lost- it stinks.

Yes, I can relate, and it’s harder because it’s your sister. And she’s can provide you with all you need to heal. If you can talk to your sister and forgive your sister and love your sister no matter what .. then you will be free :) It’s not that easy though .. there’s someone in my life I may never forgive. I guess that’s my choice.

Ok, well I’m off to do some stretching. OH- one more question– I did some yoga today- I only did about 5 or 6 poses from a “Simple Yoga” DVD but my back is burning sore now. Does that happen in the beginning?

Yes, that can happen in the beginning. You do need to go super slow, and just know you’ll feel better eventually. I am doing a new chest stretch a few times a day, and I am feeling some pain, especially in my neck muscles.

30 Days to Feel Better From Fibromyalgia is my book on how to feel better fast that anyone should be able to read, even on their worst day!

(it's broken up into a little bit of info and a restorative exercise a day) Click Here to See it!



4 thoughts on “Emotional Pain, Stress, and Fibromyalgia

  1. Hi Lisa,
    I’m getting better and better and definitely seeing the mindbody connection….I’ve even noticed that if I release some body tension, it greatly improves my mood and as a result I find it much easier to focus on positive thoughts and set the negative ones aside. I’m still finding my neck a huge issue so I’ve resorted to just basic neck stretches for the moment and if I do get supple enough, to some light trigger point massage and slowly, ever so slowly I’m seeing some improvement there. Can’t wait for full relief!!! so thank you yet again for your book.
    So on to the point of today’s message. I’ve been reading and re-reading it and came across a point I’d really like to know how you handled, if you don’t mind sharing it here. You stated:
    “One big area I have recently discovered that I really cared what others thought of me was parenting. When my son misbehaved in public I got really anxious without even knowing why.
    I eventually figured out the root cause for this and have mostly worked through the issue – and I couldn‟t do it by modifying his behavior! I had to modify my beliefs and emotional habits because the actions I had to take to modify his behavior also caused me emotional and physical pain!”
    I’m just wondering if you felt comfortable sharing a little more of this as I’m sure many of your readers could benefit from knowing a little more of this process.
    Thank-you again for your book and for your insight. I am hoping to reach your level of health very soon!
    Susan

  2. Hi…im feeling fibromylgia and im in medications for it, it help some, i need somebody tell some treatment for that…..i tried to exercises but sometimes is hard and i’d like to have a good life but around is no help for it….

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>