Panic Attacks From Very Minor Thoughts

April 18, 2010 by Lisa

I have panic attacks that are triggered by a very minor thought that I know is nothing conscientiously, but it lasts hours at a time. Do you know what this is about?

I received this question via a comment on another page where I had recommended panic away. I think it’s a very important question and I gave it several days of thought to really get clear. Here’s my answer:

First, let me say I am not a doctor or a health professional. So, this is all my own opinion based on my own experience.

… I have occasionally had extreme reactions to what seems like a very minor thought, and what I have found over the years is that this one minor thought is actually the tip of an iceberg of years of major thoughts and thought patterns and habits.

So basically, over the course of my lifetime, there are certain things that I have thought a lot about, that I have pondered and stewed in, and that I have a lot of experience with and storng opinions about.

So, when one of these subjects come up, the most minor or seemingly insignificant thought can bring up years and years worth of thoughts and habits and beliefs. These thoughts and habits and beliefs can trigger major emotions and reactions.

This can happen in a split second, based on that one thought, because that one thought is a bridge to all the other thoughts that I have ever had on that subject, and all the other thoughts I have ever thought and nurtured on that subject make up my belief. And when any belief comes to the forefront of my mind, an emotion is triggered.

My biggest issue

As an example from my own life, I will talk about my biggest issue, and my biggest trigger.

The way people treat me …

The way people treat me (and the way people treat my son) is the biggest, hugest, massivest trigger and issue I have. ESPECIALLY the way men who have any importance in my life treat me.

So, what this means is sometimes my husband can say something fairly harmless that bothers me. If I am not careful, this fairly harmless statement can trigger my issues with how I am treated and it could turn into a montrous deal in our house that lasts for days.

And I’m not making it up. I feel the way I feel and that is HORRIBLE.

But it doesn’t have to be that way

Now, I can’t deconstruct all those thoughts. I can’t make them never have happened. I can’t get rid of this issue in my life.

What I can do is find a way to think differently about the issue. This isn’t always easy (probably never is easy) bit it can lead to much greater levels of happiness and peace.

For example, I was treated very poorly by a large and threatening man for all of my childhood. This of course, is what has led to this ‘issue’ in my life.

When I think about him and my childhood these days I can think about these things as a horrid travesty that I only barely escaped with my life. — This is the version that hurts and makes me freak out.

Or, I can think about it in a different way. I can see the great relationship I have with my son now as a direct result of that horrible relationship back then. I can see my strong convictions about certain things, and my willingness to be my own person as a direct result of all that I lived through.

These are things that I love about me and my current life, and I really do have my crappy childhood to thank for it.

I can also remember that this man introduced me to computers, and now I work from home because I love computers and was comfortable with technology from my early days.

So, for me, the way to my own freedom from debilitating thoughts was

  1. To sit down and get really clear. Exactly what is bothering me. Exactly why does it bother me. What is every thought and emotion that is going on in my head. Oh, and they are all OK.
  2. To learn to sit and feel my emotions instead of thinking about them so much.
  3. To start looking for thoughts around the subject that feel better to me. That make me feel better. (and better does not immediately mean good – better may mean less scared and more mad, or less mad and more worried, or less worried and more frustrated, or less frustrated and more peaceful).

I like to think of my emotions as a stepladder back into feeling good. If you have fibromyalgia, I talk about this all in my book 30 Days to Feel Better From Fibromyalgia.

If you dont’ have fibromyalgia, I can strongly recommend Waking the Tiger; Healing Trauma especially if you have been through trauma, and Ask and It Is Given

So what do you think? Is this right on or way out there in your opinion? Do you have any experience with minor thoughts causing huge issues in your life? I’d love to hear from you.

Highly Recommended: 30 Days to Feel Better From Fibromyalgia

Previous Post: 
Next Post: 


Comments

4 Comments on Panic Attacks From Very Minor Thoughts

  1. Theresa on Mon, 19th Apr 2010 11:42 am

    2. Wow! Lisa, I really appreciate your thorough answer. It certainly makes a lot of sense. I was abused by a few men growing up in a severe way. I too have deep issues with any man I am close with. I also have a daughter ( a granddaughter now :) ) who is the love of my life and anything that bothers her bothers me HUGELY.

    The one man sexually abused my from age 3-6 or thereabouts. I was raped twice and my father was emotionally abusive and I think physically. I have not been able to define the difference between abuse and discipline.

    I also go to AA which is helpful when I use it. But it is interesting how a previous sponsor of mine used to help me handle feelings of anger in the way you just suggested. Really breaking it down and understanding where the rage is coming from and what feelings I am really feeling.

    I think I might take what you wrote and even make the solution in large and bold type and pin it to my wall.

    I can see where I can be useful to other people who have been abused, but first I need to heal more myself.

    Sometimes I think I can never be in a close relationship because of my fears of who I am. I had to break off a relationship just recently because of my panic attacks. He did not understand and I didn’t either.

    I really appreciate what you said. It gives me hope that I can heal. If it is mental, I can heal with mental help. If it is physiological, I can heal by changing my body.

    Any more suggestions or thoughts would be helpful.

  2. admin on Mon, 19th Apr 2010 2:41 pm

    3. Hi Theresa,

    I am really appreciating your second comment here. I have already been through all of this and out the other side, the better feeling side, so I kind of have forgotten what it really feels like to be … seeking.

    Of course I still seek with certain issues but I have discovered in the last several years that I CAN get myself to feel better. That my feelings CAN BE independent of things I can’t control, like other people’s actions.

    So, I forget how this feels sometimes and I am loving your reminder. I definitely want to discuss this more as I think it’s pretty important.

    I want to talk about your comment about the differenct between discipline and abuse.

    I wasn’t able to define this either because to me, I have never been able to find a discipline that didn’t feel yucky to me. Of course yelling at someone feels less bad than hitting, and ‘talking to’ feels less bad than yelling, but still, trying to impose my will and my way of thinking upon someone who doesn’t want to hear it always feels bad to me.

    In my house, with my child, there is no ‘discipline’. None. There are no punishments and no rewards. We don’t do that.

    What we do do is put the most important emphasis on our relationships and in empowering and supporting each other.

    The book, Parent Effectiveness Training talks about this. They call it Method III, the no-lose method.

    Because of who my son is (very independent and strong-willed and self-directed) I’ve had to let go of a lot of my notions about kids. My son is unschooled, which means he is homeschooled without a curriculum. We focus on his interests and I trust he will learn everything he needs to know as long as we live interesting and interested lives of freedom and joy and I facilitate his learning as a supportive, caring adult.

    But anyway, I do have more suggestions and thoughts. I still reccomend the waking the tiger book highly,

    http://www.releasefibromyalgia.com/go/wakingtiger.php

    especially for you. I had some major healing breakthroughs after reading it. I also recommend anything by Byron Katie

    http://www.releasefibromyalgia.com/go/byronkatie.php

    or maybe the astonishing power of your emotions by esther hicks.

    These are all books that I have read that have helped me with my mental states and with healing fibro.

    Lisa

  3. Crystal Dunn on Mon, 18th Jul 2011 9:55 am

    4. Lisa,
    I think you are right on in your assessment of panic and Anxiety. I loved you sharing your honest thoughts and experiences on the subject. As soon as I get a paying job, I am definately ordering your book and Panic Away. I too am healing from both Bipolar Disorder and Fibromyalgia. I am so excited and happy about my healing. My healing journey is taking me exactly where you have been. : ) It’s nice to find another person on this journey and telling it like it is. I love that. We’re so gonna have to do a show on Blog Talk Radio sometime. : )
    Crystal Dunn

  4. admin on Mon, 18th Jul 2011 12:55 pm

    5. Thanks Crystal :) I meet a lot of people who have come to similar conclusions here.

Tell me what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!